Think about a specific scenario: times when your close friend feels bad about himself or
herself or is really struggling in some way. How did you respond to your friend in this
situation (especially when you're at your best)?
Please write down your responses following the five elements of compassion discussed
1. Recognizing the suffering of others.
I have always been the go to person of my friends when it comes to these types of
situations. So I always make sure to be extra sensitive and sympathetic to whatever they
are feeling and consider their readiness to share their feelings or sufferings to me. I would
always tell them to take their time in telling me. And before simply giving advice or
before giving any help to my friends, I make sure to make them feel listened to. I try to
be fully present in the moment, putting aside my own concerns, and just focus on them
and understand what they're going through. And for me, it is important that I
acknowledge the fact that I am not the one who is currently experiencing such suffering
that they have, therefore I should be more understanding about where they are coming
from and to always assure them that their feelings are supported and valid.
2. Understanding the common humanity of this suffering
I know that in her vulnerable situation, it's easy to be consumed by our emotions so as her
friend and support I make sure that she feels grounded. That she knows I am here and
she’s not alone in her struggles. To let her speak her thoughts and vent out her
frustrations without judgment but only support and care. I don’t like saying things like
“it's fine” or “it's okay” but I always tell her that in time things will get better. To remind
her that the suffering that she’s enduring is a part of life that we somehow have to go
through in order to learn and be better. That learning and being better means being
prepared and ready to take on bigger challenges we are going to face in the future.
3. Feeling emotionally connected with the person who is suffering
As the first born in my family, I frequently showed the first-born mentality even towards
my friends. Every time I know that one of my friends is in distress, I strive to be more
sympathetic and understanding. I try to place myself in my friend's shoes in order to
better understand their emotions from their point of view. I let them know that I truly feel
